Love is a verb, not a feeling
In episode 3 of season 4 of The Crown, Queen Elizabeth II (played by Olivia Coleman) is giving her son Prince Charles a necessary lesson ahead of his wedding with Princess Diana. Speaking about the impromptu marriage between Queen Mary and King George, I found what she said in this poignant scene to be quite profound:
Focus on the Bigger idea: Duty
They (Queen Mary and King George) worked and worked and worked. And out of that work, a tiny seed grew. A seed of respect and admiration, a seed that grew into a flower they could eventually call love… Love and happiness will surely follow if you do this.
The verb “worked”, and the noun “duty” stood out to me. Because it coincides with how we as Christians are supposed to approach love; it is our duty to love, and it will require a lot of work. Our society places a superficial and commercial feature on love and what it means. This may distract us from what love truly is, a verb, not a feeling!
While working as a summer camp leader three years ago, I left that camp feeling sad and discouraged about marriage. The majority of the children I was assigned to came from broken relationships. When they would share why their parents ended their marriage, there was clearly a pattern; a pattern of two people getting together because they were “in love” with one another. When that feeling ended its course, they simply didn’t have the will or the desire to fight for their relationship, they would break up and sometimes would leave for their country of origin, if their spouse was from another country. This is the case for many people in our society today.
I remember watching Laws of Attraction (forgive me for my movie/Tv inspirations), one of the divorce lawyers mentioned how ironic it is that some couples fight tooth and nail during divorce proceedings but are unable to instil the same energy to fight for their marriage.
We must fight to love every single day. This includes loving our friends, families, spouse, colleagues, neighbours and even those that we struggle to love – they are the ones that we must love the most! It won’t be easy, but it is our duty as Christians to spread love in the world, especially in a world that needs love more than ever. Just as Olivia Coleman (Queen Elizabeth II) says, “Love and happiness will surely follow if you do this”, because love truly does conquer all.
Love one another warmly as Christian brothers and sisters, and be eager to show respect for one another.
Romans 12:10