What are you known for?
I’ve worked with small children for a period of time. It has been such an inspirational time for me - when you see little humans learning and developing both physically and mentally. Their achievements range from putting their shoes on without any help, putting the basket full of plastic dinosaurs back on the shelf where it belongs to finally being able to use the potty correctly without any accidents! … you can see their smile and joy-filled “I did it!” when they accomplish these small things.
I remember cooking dinner at home one day when I was younger. The smell of fried potatoes and vegetables filled the house and I called everybody to come to the table and eat. And when my dad said that he had really enjoyed the food I was so pumped! “I did it”, I said to myself … for me, that was a big success.
Nowadays success looks different. It has become more about career development, getting a big promotion, and earning lots of money. When it’s your birthday (or a special occasion in general) people wish you success in life, which often means getting a good job and lots of money … which is important, of course. Yet, has any ever wished that you would receive lots of love, and indeed, that you would love others well in return?
The success of this world
To be known by others is one of our psychological needs as human beings. Other people know us mainly by our name or by our physical appearance, our faces. We also may be known for the thing we do or things we make. For example, artists are known for their works of art, whether that be their paintings, sculptures, or music. Writers are known for the words – wise or unwise - things that they have said or written.
We all desire connection. We chase success of all kinds in order to be individually known so that people may greet us on the street, in a prayer group we might attend or in our workplace. We always want more followers on Instagram or Twitter and more likes and shares on Facebook. And if we achieve all this we think we will be successful enough to show the world our achievements and the world will in return praise us.
Is that really what we want? Is this the kind of success that we need? When did we conform to desire what the world desires?
Please note that I am not saying that having a good job that is well paid or to be promoted are in their own right wrong desires. We need good and wise people in these kinds of roles, leadership positions, and in politics also. However, we also need Christians in big companies and media positions for instane. The desire to chase success can sometimes become bigger than what really is important and can consume us and our true selves, to the extent that we might forget what God is calling us to.
… so what is important then?
What true success looks like
Let me tell you a story:
One hot summer day a group of missionaries arrived in a small village in Romania. They were about to spend a couple of weeks in this small village with the people living there. It didn’t take long for the people from the village to visit the missionaries’ house with fruit and vegetables for them from their gardens. After each mass, people gathered around the young students and wanted to chat with them, share their stories, or just simply listen to them. Children rushed out of the church because they wanted to play and have fun with their missionary friends and sometimes they acted as if they were glued to the poor missionaries and did not want to let them go!
What was so special about these young people? What were they ‘successful’ in? Well, most of them were students and had only part-time jobs to cover the expenses for their studies. The answer is very simple: they loved. The people from the village knew the missionaries because they had been there before and people remembered them. They remembered the joy and love present during those days. They remembered they had been heard and seen. They remembered they had been loved simply as they were.
Be known for lovE
At this point let me remind you what Tertullian said about the first Christians, “See how they love one another...” The first Christians were known even among the pagans by their love for each other! They were known for their love and that was their success.
Aren’t we supposed to be like them? Aren’t we supposed to love like them? To be known for the love we have for one another and for our enemies? I truly believe that our ultimate success (except making it to heaven) is to love and to love well. That’s the way to heaven after all. Sometimes it may be really challenging and sometimes it might seem impossible. However, if we persevere we can learn to love as Jesus loves. Perhaps little baby steps are more than enough for the beginning. For some people to love is to cook dinner for their family, if you are a child perhaps it is to tidy up the toy dinosaurs lying around the sitting room, for others to love could mean to be present and to listen to another.
Sometimes, to love means to speak and open up your heart to those who love you.