Called to walk
In this strange period of time when we have a lot of time to ponder, we can discover so many talents that we never knew we had. I’ve discovered that I have quite a knack for photography. Although I’m still very shy about revealing my masterpieces, it’s been interesting to identify this about myself. It got me to thinking about this idea of self-discovery and led me to think that the world goes so fast. It’s only when we slow down that we are able to be at one with ourselves again.
We go through so much, and we let ourselves go through good and bad on a much higher level when we don’t stop and reflect on how everything impacts on us. If we don’t even know ourselves 100% or everything we are capable of, how are we supposed to know others? How can I build more time into reflection for me and my actions and also for others I’ve encountered in my day and their actions, breaking down how that person acts and reacts, whether it annoys me or doesn’t really bother me… this is where all of us are called to walk.
“Us vs. Them”
I recently watched one of Fr Mike Schmitz videos (can’t remember which one unfortunately!) and he mentioned this phrase of “us vs. them” and how we can never have this as our dominant mindset. It’s very easy as Catholics to see ourselves as different from others in society and people who may or may not be Catholic can set that standard and stereotype for us. However, Fr Mike explains in his video how we shouldn’t have a mindset of “us vs. them” but rather just simply “us” because it enables us to walk with everyone and not just feel comfortable in our friend circles. Everybody is a child of God after all, even those who may not want to be. I always found it very intriguing, (and extremely difficult to practice) the idea of seeing the face of Jesus in every single person that you encounter everyday; the colleague you don’t get on with, the classmate who is attention-seeking, the homeless woman on the street, the postman, the lecturer and the list goes on. This concept of equality opened my eyes the origin of what it is to be human and in all honesty, basic. If all our talents, accents, ethnicities, status’, personal qualities, physical qualities and genders were taken away from us, we would all be pretty similar, left with just our souls that are different. So I guess we need to reflect on this more as we slow down.
Listening and Support
We are all called to walk, walk with friends, family, colleagues, the person you sit beside on the train etcetera, literally and emotionally. So when a friend has a bad day and calls us, we listen, we empathise and we console. Listening to what they have to say without interrupting them to explain how you went through it or something similar, letting them talk it out and bounce it off of you. It helps them, but it can help us even more, not just to practice our listening skills, but to really focus on what the person is saying- someone you love- and emotionally support them with your love, listening and attentiveness. Empathy is natural. If we’ve gone through a similar situation we can relate, but if we haven’t, listening can help us to really feel the pain of that person that we love and that’s where consoling comes in. This alone can be a form of comfort, just listening and empathizing and consoling, it’s answering our call to walk with others, just as Jesus did.
Impulse vs. Patience
It’s so easy, in a thriving and busy world, to make decisions on impulse. Not just your practical decisions, but also the decisions that are somewhat warped and transform into judgements. We are all guilty of it. We make rash judgements everyday without even thinking, and without self-reflection, never thinking about it again! This especially happens with people we meet. School was a great time for us all when we learned about the beauty of judgement (the joys of all-girl schools for me). Judging someone for how they look, talk, seek attention, walk, wear their makeup, style their hair… the list goes on… it’s bred into us from a young age and it’s pretty hard to escape that ‘practice’ shall we say, the longer we do it.
Story time!
I remember in college, there was a history seminar I took that had around 15 students in it. Majority were quiet but some were extremely talkative and bored and were clearly only there for attendance marks. I was one of them. Of course I had a few pals there for moral support. I remember one day in class I decided I was going to concentrate and do what students should do! I answered a question the professor asked and this girl started talking right over me as if what I had to say was not going to matter, and in that moment I thought, what a cow? Well actually I thought something a lot worse but for the purpose of this blog post I’ll keep it clean. That was my reaction of impulse like many of them that day and many other days. I didn’t go home and reflect on it and therefore I really let this girl know that I knew what she had done every time I went to that class.
It wasn’t until the next year we were in another class together and the professor paired us all up, and guess who was my partner?! At this point we had had a whole year of eyeing each other up and down with pure judgement. She made me angry and I definitely wasn’t in her good books. We didn’t have our pals to support us in this class. It was just her and I. We were now vulnerable and forced into contact. The activity we had to do was a 10 minute discussion on ‘perspective’s matter’ ironically enough, and present our thoughts collectively to the class. So it was to my surprise that the conversation would continue over coffee after that class. We realised we were similar and had a lot in common. We’re still friends today, queue the “when I first met my best friend I thought she was a … cow” meme. You know the real meme! I reflected on it that evening and thought wow, imagine if I had more patience with all the people that I’ve quickly judged and actually tried to walk with them and communicate, imagine the amount of hurt and anger I could have prevented not only in my life, but in others?
Authentic Connection
We’re all the same at the end of the day. We’re all human, we’re all seeking the same thing... (which is happiness hopefully!) we’re all children of God, and we’re all called to walk. Real connection and authentic, truthful ways of being helps us to really answer our call to walk! So I know that when this weird isolation period is over, we’re all going to appreciate society, family, friends, college and work more. However, before then, try practicing reflection. Prepare for the great adventures and relationships ahead, to be the best version of yourself, the happiest version. Maybe then you might just discover how easy and fulfilling it is to answer the call to walk.